Unintended Lecture

Times are hard, and by that I mean, I'm tired. But I will try to write something just for you...if I can just...summon...the...strength!

I'm sure everyone reading this has noticed how stores come out with holiday merchandise earlier and earlier every year. In addition, I have noticed a larger variety of merchandise every year. You can't just have fireworks for the 4th of July anymore. You have to have a shirt with a flag on it, a hat with a flag on it, an apron with a flag on it. EVERYTHING WITH A FREAKING FLAG ON IT. It speaks more and more to our wastefulness and materialism. When will we ever say enough is enough? When we have covered everything in sight in red, white, and blue? When we have finally exhausted all our resources and are fighting to survive on a barren planet? My goodness people! Have some self control! Have some limits! Don't be so greedy! Maybe, just maybe, enjoy the moment more often and forget all the 'things'.

There is your blog. Sorry it turned out as a lecture.

Not That Brave

We are finally getting into the hotter time of the summer and I HATE IT! Don't get me wrong. I love the classic summer activities such as swimming, camping,fishing, and hiking. But I am still morning the small window of time in which you could ride your bike during the day time without passing out from heat stroke and getting a seriously wicked sunburn. In fact, that happens with about any outdoor activity now. Even walking out to the car is a chore. The whole ten steps to the car I am thinking, "Are we there yet?!" So I spend most of my time holed up in our tiny living quarters trying to decide how much I can run the swamp cooler without going bankrupt. The answer - 20 seconds per day. *tear*

The only way to do anything outside now is to a) get up and out in the early morning, b) go out under the cover of darkness, c) brave the new world. Since I work almost every morning, option A. is out even on days when I don't work because on those days I just want to stay in bed and forget about the coming heat. Option C. doesn't really work because I don't own any night vision glasses and I don't wish to stumble around in the darkness. That leaves option B. and I'm not to brave.

Feeling Crafty

Yep, that's right. Being the nerd that I am, I every so often get urges of craftiness. I feel like buying a whole bunch of things like pipe cleaners, glitter, and small wooden pieces and making something 'pretty' out of them. The problem - no money. To be a serious crafter these days you have to spend TONS of money. Don't have glitter? No problem! Just spend $8 and you can get a tiny bottle that will last one magical sprinkle. Need glue? Not sure which one of the 20 kinds of glue you need? Buy them all! Want to sew a quilt? Just get a $1000 sewing machine, and don't forget all the supplies! Now I suppose to save money I could turn to the more traditional crafting methods. For example, gathering leaves and sticks and fashioning them into some kind of structure using sap to hold it together...... I think I'll just save my money.

Me And My Big Mouth

Conversation between me and my 6-year-old nephew, Kyle:

Me: What is that?

Kyle: (excitedly) That's my ant farm!

Me: Are they alive?

Kyle: Do they look like they are alive?

Me: No. (now mentally kicking myself for saying that)

Kyle: (looks upset)

Me: (opening my big mouth again) I had ants at my house, but the exterminator came and killed all of them.

Kyle: (looks even more upset) Oh....

Me: (trying to save face) But there are lots more ants in the world.

Kyle: (brightening slightly) Yeah, there are.

Just Your Friendly Neighborhood Ant Man

Today we had a lovely visit from some pest control people since ants have been slowly engulfing our kitchen for the last week. Bear is the only one who didn't seem to mind the ants. When they got into her food bowl she just looked at us like, "Why haven't you added these to my food before? They are tasty and fun to catch!" However, yesterday she threw up two huge piles of what looked like more dog food than she could eat in a month. One inside and one outside....for good measure. So maybe the ants weren't such a good diet choice.

The pest control guy was all business, if by business you mean, "Yeah this pesticide messes with them and then they're gonna die!" Ok, so maybe those weren't his exact words, but he did seem really excited to be killing ants. I guess some boys never grow out of that. He also pointed out a leak in our water heater while he was crawling around under our house with all the ants. Just your friendly neighborhood ant man. Ha ha! But seriously, I'm sure glad I am only renting this place. Do I really want to own a home someday?

For me, pest control is a double-edged sword. While I have a diversion to most things that are creepy and or crawly, I also like to stay away from the chemicals. But the pest control guy assured us as he was waving a chemical spray in every direction that it was perfectly safe once it dried in about 30 minutes. If our entire family dies of an unexplained sickness in the next few days, please make sure justice is served.

It Can't Hurt

Mike and I went bike riding again last night and I have to say it is addicting. Even when your butt still hurts from the last time you road, you still want to go again. We only planned on going a short distance, but ended up going farther. I think this is because when you are on a bike you see so many things that you don't see in a car. It is like seeing everything for the first time. It's better than walking because it is much faster and you feel like you are actually getting somewhere. The only complaint I have about bike riding is that modern areas are not very biker-friendly. I am talking about big roads, freeways, and the like. Society is designed more and more towards cars and not bikes or pedestrians. So it goes, I guess. Luckily, I have a good river-walk/bike path close to my house.

I have gotten two flat tires since beginning bike riding and replaced both of them with tires that are guaranteed never to go flat. We will see. The only thing I still need for bike riding is a helmet. I never used to to even think about a helmet, but the older I get the more I realize how unpredictable life can be. Not wearing a helmet because you have never gotten hurt is like not using a condom because you have never gotten anyone pregnant before. (Yes, some has actually said this to me.) Besides, most other bike riders I see are wearing helmets now. I don't know if it is because people are being smarter or because we live in a over-protected society. Either way, I figure it can't hurt.

The Time Of Painful Feet

Success! I have made it back from Vegas alive....barely. The last night was a little rough, but luckily Mike saved me with french fries. Let me explain. When a person drinks a lot of alcohol because their husband is temping them to do so, they get very sick and can only be saved by delicious alcohol-absorbing french fries. Mmmmmmmmm Thus, I live to tell the tale of Vegas.

It all started with walking. MILES AND MILES OF WALKING. You would think your feet would get used to the abuse after a few DAYS and after a very expensive foot massage that included a 20% 'because we can' charge. No way. I will now look back at my Vegas vacation as 'the time of painful feet'. But that didn't stop us from enjoying it.

We saw two very good shows, Zumanity and Phantom of the Opera. We also spent A LOT of money on other activities that would have been about $5 in Utah. Here are some pictures from those activities. Keep in mind that I am saving you about $300 by showing you these pictures.

Here is the Shark Reef Exhibit. No pictures of actual sharks. Sorry your time was wasted, but at least you didn't loose any money.












This is the Dolphin Sanctuary and Secret Garden. The only secret here is that you can see the ENTIRE Hogal Zoo in Utah for less money.







Here is the outside of the Titanic Exhibit at the Luxor. It might have been worth the money if you could have taken pictures inside. Might.



This is the one place that was actually worth our money - The Nine Fine Irishmen Pub in New York New York. The pictures aren't that great because it was always dark in there, but the live music was FREE to listen to and the food, although somewhat pricey, was worth every penny because it was AMAZING.





All in all we had a nice break from reality where we could do whatever we wanted and spend money willy nilly without worrying about responsibilities or bills. But I must say it was nice to return home where everything doesn't smell like smoke and their isn't always the sound of slot machines and elevator music in the background. And Bear. Bear is the best part.

Here are a few more pictures just to prove we were there and to say "Neener neener, we were in Vegas and you weren't."

Keep Between 60 And 80 Degrees

Once again I am up at 6AM, but it doesn't really matter because today I go to VEGAS BABY! That's right, I am leaving Utah which just yesterday started to become unbearably hot, to go to a place at least 20 degrees HOTTER. It's OK though because Las Vegas is really just a air-conditioned city. You can't go outside many places in Vegas without being sprayed with cooling mist or without being within a few feet of an air-conditioned spot. I cringe to think of all the energy that is wasted on all that air-conditioning, but I also cringe at the thought of 106 degree weather. I would like to say I am tough and I can withstand extreme temperatures. But I have really just become another pampered American who can't go above 80 degrees or below 60 degrees without whining. But let's not focus on my weaknesses this morning. Let's focus on the fact that I am going to have a REALLY FUN VACATION! You can't tell I am excited, can you? Needless to say, the blog will be put on hold for a short while because while there are computers in Vegas, you can bet I won't be using any of them.

No Dice

I'm not sure why I am writing to you this early in the morning. For some ungodly reason my body decided to be wide awake at 6AM this morning even though I don't have to work at all today. I laid in bed for a good half hour trying to go back to sleep, but no dice. When I was a kid I seemed to always have energy, but maybe that was just because I always went to bed on time. As an adult I developed this thing called - "I can sleep at a drop of a hat." But not today. Oh no. I must wake up at 6AM and then probably feel like taking a nap later in the day. I suppose being an adult is more tiring than being a child. Their is always so much to do and think about as an adult. When I was a kid I really never did anything I didn't want to except homework, and even that was usually enjoyable because I was an odd child. I don't know if I do more now, or my body is just getting old and tired, or both. But I do know I would be overjoyed if some magic pill was invented that gave you unlimited energy. I am not ignoring the fact that there are energy drinks and coffee. I am just ignoring the idea that they do any good whatsoever. For one thing, energy drinks taste about as good as vomit. Coffee is not so bad, but it starts a world war in my stomach every time I drink it. None of this really matters because caffeine just makes you into a jittery zombie who thinks of nothing but more "CAFFEIEEEEEEEENE!" Also, the heart of a caffeine zombie does not stop but beats so fast that is is likely to stop at any second. Then, no more zombie, only what you wanted all along - endless sleep.

Like Kids In A Candy Shop

Mike has wanted a bike for almost as long as I can remember. Whenever we talked about exercising he would say, "If I only had a bike I would ride it all the time." Well yesterday his dream came true. Not that it was easy. I think we visited four or five different sporting goods stores until he finally decided on a bike......online. It was delivered yesterday and of course he spent a good portion of the day putting it together instead of getting rock chip repair on his windshield like he was supposed to. Let's just hope there is not a new windshield in our near future.

As soon as I got home from work Mike wanted to go riding and I had to remind him of certain necessities such as EATING before we could go for a ride. After dinner, we set out on our "short" bike ride just to test the new bike. We didn't anticipate, however, how much we would love riding bikes. We were like two little kids with goofy grins on our faces speeding all over the place. Before we knew it, our "short" ride had turned into a very long ride. We came home exhausted but giddy. The whole experience was very satisfying......until today. Let's just say my butt is very happy to be in a soft cushy chair right now. There probably won't be any more riding for me for a while.