Break From Reality

I'm sure anyone who reads this blog has noticed I have once again been lacking in the picture department. I haven't been in much of a picture-taking mood lately, and, to tell the truth, it has been kind of nice not worrying about it. But I start to get bored with no pictures, so here are a few of my family on Christmas morning. I know that according to the date on the pictures, they where taken in August, but that just comes from me forgetting to set the date on my digital camera.

I love this day, but not for the same reasons I did when I was a kid. When I was a kid I could hardly sleep the night before because I was so excited for the presents the next day. Today the presents are still a part of the excitement for me, but only a small part. Most of my enjoyment now comes from watching my nieces and nephews get excited. It also comes from spending time with family without worrying about work, chores, or shopping. Christmas is like a one-day break from reality, and even though I know it can't last forever, a part of me wishes it could.

Even if Christmas can't last all year, I think I will try to make every day a little more like Christmas. That means doing little things like spending more time with those I love, worrying less, giving to those in need, celebrating good times, and feeling joyful and thankful. I have always heard people talk about keeping Christmas in your heart all year round, but I never thought much about putting it into practice. This coming year I will try my best to do it because even if I can't always have a break from reality, I can at least be a little happier and try to make others happier too.

Straight And To The Point

It seems like most bloggers start to slack a little during the holiday season and I guess I am no exception. But it's not because I have been unusually busy or anything. All my presents are bought and Christmas cards are sent. I guess I will call it writers block because I want to blog, but every time I try to think of something interesting to write, every idea seems really lame. If there's one thing I hate, it's writing just to write or talking just to talk. You know what I mean. Those people who can go on for hours and hours and not say anything of importance.

When I was in school I always hated when the teacher told us to write however many pages about some topic. I always had a hard time filling the pages even when using the typical tricks like writing really big and double-spacing. I would get to the point in the first couple of sentences and then I would run out of things to say. Now I'm a little better at elaborating, but I'm still not a super detailed writer. I'm like that in the rest of my life too. I don't like over-the-top decorations, or houses filled in every corner. I don't like too many details or things start to look cluttered and become overwhelming. Life is confusing enough without complicating it with extra deals. I always like when people keep things simple and get to the point.

Details spice up life, but too many tend to get in the way. So if you are one of those people who can talk forever about nothing, consider the idea that doing so only makes you look unintelligent. Get to the point and shut your mouth.

Giving

It's the Christmas season and this time of year everyone talks about giving to those less fortunate than yourself. I'm all for giving to those in need, because I know that I could easily be in their shoes. But there are a few things that bother me about giving.

For one thing, need is relative. A child may need some new clothes or want some new toys, but what about other children who are starving? We may not be obligated to give to the most needy first, but is it right to ignore the worst-off people?

Now say I disregard the most needy and decided for whatever reason to give by getting a toy for a poor child for Christmas. What if that child doesn't like the toy I get him? Isn't that a waste of my money and generosity? What if I give that child a used toy? That seems to be frowned upon, yet I'm sure there are children who would appreciate any toy they could get their hands on. If a child doesn't want a used toy, doesn't that mean we are spoiled rather than truly needy?

The last problem I have with giving is that I am not a rich person. I know that doesn't mean I can't give, but it does mean that any amount I give will be minuscule compared to what a rich person or corporation could give. I know it shouldn't matter how much you can give. But it kind of makes you feel like it's pointless if all you can give is $5 and a corporation has millions to give.

In the end, I guess it really is the thought that counts. I can't help every starving person, and I can't spend forever analyzing who is the most needy. But I can give a little here and there, and I think I will be a better person for it. There is a scene in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory where Charlie gives back the gobstopper candy that could have made his family rich and Willy Wonka says, "So shines a good deed in a weary world." This quote reminds me of the true spirit of giving because in a world full of bad things, I can still try to make a difference with small and simple deeds.

Popular

Growing up, I could never lay claim to being a part of the popular crowd. Even if I hadn't been extraordinarily shy, I still don't think I would have been accepted into the group of cheerleaders or jocks or prepy kids or whoever it was that was popular. Maybe I wasn't pretty enough, trendy enough, cool enough, or rich enough to be included. But I blame my exclusion mostly on the fact that my family was pretty weird, and at least some of the weirdness was bound to rub off on me.

I may have not liked being unpopular back in the day, but these days I don't hold any bitterness about it. That's because I have realized an important fact - popularity is an illusion. EVERYONE is different or 'weird' to some extent. The popular kids only cover it up better. But have you ever tried to keep a secret for a very long time? You may have tried, but it almost always comes out sooner or later. Popularity is the same way. You are only popular as long as you can cover up your secret weirdness.

So these days, I prefer genuine friends - the people who know all your secrets and still love and accept you. Life is too short to fake who you really are just so other people will like you. Besides, all those 'other people' are as imperfect as you, so who are they to judge what is 'popular'?

Sociology

I planned on posting sooner than this, but work has kept me sufficiently worn out. I literally sat down in front of the computer several times to start writing when I realized I couldn't keep my eyes open for more than a few seconds, let alone form a coherent thought. Also, I have been busy doing things like putting up a Christmas tree with Mike.

Isn't it gorgeous? It is a real one, so it smells fabulous as well. I think I am in love with it. Anyway, on to the next topic.

Sociology. What is that, you ask? Well let me give you a few definitions.

1. The study of the development, structure, and functioning of human society.
2. The study of social problems.
3. The study of human social behavior, especially the study of the origins, organization, institutions, and development of human society.
4. Analysis of a social institution or societal segment as a self-contained entity or in relation to society as a whole.

I took a class in this subject in college, and before that time I had never even heard of sociology. I only took it because it was required for one of my credits, but the more I learned about it, the more fascinated I was by it. It was one of the few classes where I actually enjoyed reading the text book. Crazy, huh? I don't remember most of the specifics from the class because it was 11 years ago that I took it. (Whew, I can't believe it has been that long since I started college.) All I remember is that is was really interesting to me, and for some reason I am suddenly thinking about it again 11 years later. Strange.

One idea that I got from studying sociology is that the way a person turns out is a combination of two things - 1. Biology, and 2. The environment in which that person was raised. Sociology deals mostly with the environment part, and I am interested in that because the idea that the environment (such as society) can change who you are is so fascinating to me. For example, if I grew up in China, would I like the same foods, or the same music, or have the same beliefs about life? Maybe to some extent, but I doubt I would be the exact same person I am now. So it follows that we all, at least partially, are products of our environment. Our environment changes us! Just think about that. You may think you are in control of your environment, but did you ever think that your environment may control you?

So that is just a little sociology food for thought for you. What I described is more the micro side of sociology, however, I find the macro side of it just as interesting. I know I haven't done the subject justice in this post, but maybe I sparked a little curiosity so you will go out and learn more about sociology.

Life In A Bubble

I dislike when people think they can hide from the bad things in life. They think they can do this by not watching rated "R" movies, or only listening to music without swear words, or only dressing in a way that doesn't show too much skin, or by not drinking alcohol. While this behavior is commendable in general, I don't think there is any point in NEVER doing these things. Yes, you may very well save yourself some heartache by staying away from these things, but you will also never learn about the true scope of human existence. In other words, you can't know how good life can be unless you experience how bad life can be. Hiding from the negative parts of life doesn't make you a better person. It just makes you ignorant.

Also, think about the people who had no choice but to experience the worst in life. People who where abused as children. People who have starved. People who are mentally or physically ill. People who have experienced any sort of trauma. You can't 'un-live' or forget those kinds of things, so if I lived through something horrible I would be almost offended that there are people who want to live their lives as if those horrible things don't exist. If you lived through something like being sexually abused, would you want to go to a therapist who has never seen anyone act sexually inappropriate, or never even seen a movie with a nude scene? Of course not! You want to go to someone who has been through what you have been through, or at the very least knows a lot about it.

I'm not saying you have to go out and experience as many bad things as you can just so you can relate to those who have experienced them. Just don't avoid them at all cost just so you can sleep a little easier at night. Ignorance may be bliss, but is ignorance good?

I Can Do Anything You Can Do

I hate when people assume I can't do something because I am a woman, or they think I'm not strong enough or smart enough. These stereotypes aren't as prevalent as they used to be, but they still exist, and I see them from time to time. I see it when people think I can't lift something heavy, or I can't fix something, or I know nothing about cars. Granted, I am not an expert at any of those things, but I can do a lot more than what you might think, and if you tell me I can't do something, it only makes me want to try harder to do it to prove you wrong. I don't like stereotypes, and I don't want anyone to feel like they have to live their life by them. Heck, I would probably be a contractor if I thought I had the energy it takes to do a job like that. Everyone thinks of that as a "male" job, but stereotypes wouldn't keep me away if I decided that was what I wanted to do. I like to surprise people with what I know and what I am capable of, and I think if more people stay determined, they might even surprise themselves at what they can do.