The Princess and the Pauper

 I remember not too many years ago, when I was just starting out on my own, money was very tight, and I had to make every cent count.  Fast forward to today, and most of the time, I can spend reasonably without worrying if I will have enough money in my account.  I am grateful for this every day.

As a poor twenty-something in my first apartment, I would go to great lengths to save money because there were times when it came down to a few dollars in my account, and I had to decide what food or medication or bill was most important to pay for.  I have been on food stamps and have gotten free food from a food pantry.  Don't get me wrong.  I was never destitute or homeless. My health was good for the most part, and luckily I had my dad to fall back on if I got in any real trouble.  However, I know many people don't have all of that, and they suffer far worse consequences than I ever did.  That's why it makes me feel so amazed, happy, and blessed to be in an excellent financial situation now.

When money was tight, I always took a calculator to the store and added up every item I wanted so I wouldn't go over what money I had to spend on food.  (Which wasn't always very much.)  Often I would have to put food back before checkout or buy a cheaper item rather than an expensive one.  I dreaded going to the doctor because I couldn't afford it, let alone any medication he or she might prescribe.  Buying a treat for myself like a new item of clothing or going to a movie was a very rare occurrence.  If I got money for my birthday, I would sometimes spend it on food or bills.  Going on a vacation was out of the question.

These days I have a job that I have been at for over 13 years, and Mike makes a very good living at his job as well.  We have medical insurance, a home, two very nice cars, and money in savings.  We eat out frequently and buy things for fun just about any time we have extra money.  We even get to go on vacation here and there.

I'm not saying all this to make anyone jealous or angry.  I can hardly believe my good fortune myself.  I'm only saying that when I hear of people struggling to get by or who are even just a little strapped for cash, I can relate in a big way.  I try to give back when I can, and I never judge or look down on those who have few material possessions.  I only sympathize and hope that one day they can find a way to also turn from a pauper to a princess.   

Whispered Words and Petty Power

 Whispered words.  Sideways glances.  Low tones.  Concerned looks.  We all know the feeling when we know we are being left out of something important.  It's not a good feeling.

Why does it happen?  I feel like if it happens at a business or workplace, it's usually under the guise of being "professional".  People seem to think they are being professional when they withhold information from the lower rank employees.  However, in my experience, it is less about professionalism and more about personal feelings and a petty assertion of power.   

It seems to me like when a person has a little bit of power over someone else, they like to rub it in by whispering about things that don't need to be whispered about.  This makes people with the secret feel more special and important than the people around them.

All these secrets really aren't being kept as much as they are being used to manipulate people.  This bothers me to no end because it only leads to misinformation and negative feelings.  Why not just be honest and open with all your fellow humans?

I can concede the need for some secrets in life, but I think they should rarely, if ever, need to be exploited to make others feel bad.  Maybe I am blind to the inner politics of certain groups.  However, if being in the loop means being secretive and hurtful, leave me in the dark.